Saturday, May 5, 2012

I'm getting old

I'm nearly 35. I almost nearly just wrote 'I'm nearly 34', which goes to show one sign of my ageing. I forget things. All the time. I wonder how people approached middle age pre-i-phone-note-or-even-Siri-technology, because I have to set reminders for everything. (And just an aside - I was just thinking while typing that how poignant this blog entry will be in 30 years when I really have lost my marbles. Will I even remember writing it, or will I just scoff in a nanna way and tell that young whippersnapper writer that she's got no idea what it's like to keep forgetting things?!). But Siri doesn't help me when I head towards a room in the house to get something, get there, and stare blankly, wondering what I was there for. I think a lot of people have headed to the shop for one thing only to come home with a boot full of groceries sans that one thing, but how many have gone and sat in the car ready to go and thought 'where am I going again?'. Most of the time the memory loss is just an inconvenience, but when it means I forget my favourite show is on tv and go to bed early instead it makes me sad. Because another sign of my ageing is that I CBF with new technology most of the time. We could get a TIVO or HDD recorder thing, and I'd never miss Parenting or Offspring again, but I'm not sure I want to read the instructions to figure out how it all works. Luckily Apple hasn't changed their i-phone too much from when I got my first one when I was a sprightly 32 year old. I found Siri by accident - I knew she was in there, I just CBF reading about how to get her out! Itunes is in the too hard basket. Speaking of music, I have been known to listen to AM when FM is playing current music that makes my ears bleed. I just don't understand Nicki Minaj. LMFAO was funny for the first few times, but don't get me started on Rhianna and the lyrics they allow on the radio - or wireless ;) - these days...or the images on the video clips that aren't appropriate for children...The funny thing is, part of me will always think Olivia Newton-John's Let's Get Physical is about aerobics so I don't know how much the kids are absorbing but it does give me one more thing to old-person whinge about. I wake up cranky. Not surprising really, considering this morning we had 5 people in a Queen sized bed and I spent most of the night removing C3's foot from my bum. Some time in the early hours C4 came in an excitedly announced 'Mum!! My hair has growed!' which was kind of cute but meant I had to squeeze him in somewhere too. I'm frowning right now, it's too bright, C1 playing my iphone is too loud, I need to wash my hair but because my greys don't blend so well in wet hair (and tend to spring up an out) that means I'll have to dry it too, the heater is drying out my eyeballs and I have a pain in my ear. All old people thoughts. Having so many old people cranky thoughts means old people wrinkles. I should have put $50/week away when I was younger to fund the things I do to try and disguise my oldness to the general public. Skin cleansers, moisturisers, hair treatments, colours. What I also should have done was appreciate what I had when I had it! Why do young people dye their hair anyway? They don't realise it's something they'll be committing 4 hours every month to getting their colour seen to once they reach middle age, until they get to old age when it's ok to be grey with a pink or purple rinse. In my long life I've been fat, then thin, then fat too many times to count and metabolism is not on my side anymore. Neither is motivation, which after so many fat to thin transformations has pretty much disappeared. But, here's something else to be all old-person about, now is the time when this poor old body could benefit from carrying 20kg less from my hips/back/cracked heels. So now is the time to go and thermal Olay my face, wash my hair in some expensive hair stuff, dry it, fight thoughts about 'what's the point of doing this? Especially now my hair is nice!' and get on the cross trainer while listening to some of that which the younger generation call music. I'm not going down without a fight.

1 comment:

Princess Martha said...

Jesus, you sound like you are 57years old....are you sure I wasnt born after you? We best check our birth certificates! You sound like you are aging faster than me, hahahaha....I have some great bottles of wine from mudgee just waiting for us to crack open....sounds like you need them!!